DEAR Lumps of Meat, Bone and Water (that is mainly what we are)
This will be the last newsletter until September because I am going to Edinburgh for the whole of August to perform in the Glasgow Festival, and I’m not sure if Edinburgh has the internet or not.
Some of you decided to come to my Ed previews in the end then, so thanks to those who did.
None of you came to The Wheatsheaf on 1st July though did you?
It pleases me to inform you that the show went ahead, to no punters and 4 friends and I have to say, it went extremely well.
So you can consider yourselves irrelevant. I have 2 previews left. One in Colchester this Thursday (18th) and one in Brighton on the 29th.
I have no friends in Colchester or Brighton, so consider yourself relevant if you live in either of those towns, and come along.
I’ll be doing A Bic for Her at The Stand every day at 11.10am.
I will not be adapting the show to fit in with the slightly unsociable timeslot.
You’ve read the blurb.
Don’t be angry because you’ve had to listen to “issues” before you’ve had lunch.
I will also be doing The Unbelievable Truth on 15th August and Fred MacAulay on the 7th and hopefully Richard Herring’s podcast (date TBA).
I’ll be turning down pretty much everything else as as you all know, I am not pursuing a career in comedy.
Would you believe it? I have a book deal.
Its going to be about feminism.
Every time someone ran the story though, they put inverted commas around the words “funny feminism”.
For example, “Century buys “funny feminism” from Christie.” I think we all know what the inverted commas mean.
Well, well well. Would you believe it? Good old Radio 4 have commissioned another series of Minds the Gap.
I can’t wait to get cracking on all the silly sexists that have popped up out of the U-bend since the last series.
I’ve just filmed my slot for the Alternative Comedy Experience for Comedy Central. And my bits on the Alternative Comedy Memorial Society BLAPS.
They are two different shows!
Both Tom Bell and the 1st AD Mark Gillespie threw a real fish in my face. It was quite smelly but felt nice.
Tom Bell managed to throw one so that it landed perfectly on my chest and then stayed there because I was so sweaty.
I’m also filming a Culture Show Edinburgh Festival special along with 2 other ace comics. It’ll be going out in August.
I hope I don’t come across as a self-righteous knob in it.
Because of the hot weather I’m not wearing any socks, but because I’m quite sweaty the black dye from my shoes has run onto my feet and turned them a sort of dark grey, blackish colour.
This wouldn’t normally be a problem in of itself, but because I also have a fungal infection on my right toenails (not the left ones), it looks like my right foot is dead.
I keep looking at it and being amazed.
When my husband gets in from work I shall say, “Look at my dead foot!”. I expect he’ll just ignore me, like he normally does.
TALK TO YOU IN SEPTEMBER, I IMAGINE.